Yesterday I was left wanting more and I went ahead and got the more I wanted today.  I don’t know what came over me, but I just wanted to eat what I wanted to eat… and it consisted of some Taco Bell and Dairy Queen blizzard.  I would like to lie and say it didn’t happen, or even not write what I did– but I know I need to be honest about my slip ups.  Today kind of hurt… I am worried I didn’t completely get it out of my system, but then again I surely hope I did!  Tomorrow will be a new and better today.

On a positive note, I went walking twice during breaks at work and was able to get in all of my exercise steps– so that was a huge plus.  I have not done that during the week in weeks.  All in all, calorie wise it wasn’t a good day, but exercise wise it was a great day.  I just need to balance the two out!

I stayed within my calories today… woo hoo!  But I was certainly left wanting more and even as I sit here am having feelings of wanting something else to eat.  I won’t, but just feeling that way right now.

I had an ok morning with the grey box.  I was 206.6.  Kind of not happy with that, was hoping to be down even more given that I know I really had not gained back 15 pounds of what I lost… so now I am still 10 pounds up.  Hopefully next week I will be down even more– I just can’t go as crazy this weekend as I did this past weekend (and really it wasn’t too bad, but looking back now at the calories intake was more than I realized).  Having good days like today make me confident that next week will be good as well.

I had a really nice weekend.   I went over both Saturday and Sunday- but not too bad, especially considering the fact that I was at a huge picnic to celebrate my sister’s wedding and I did not go completely bananas.  I am a little nervous about getting on the grey box in the morning because of yesterday and today– but overall I still think it will be positive.  I have a busy week of work which sometimes makes it easy to stay on track for the week because I am too busy to think about anything else.  Hoping tomorrow morning is positive!

I had some wine today, and that caused me to go a little (just a very little) over my calories.   I didn’t exceed my exercise calories, but I still went over.  And it was WORTH it because I had a really long day and it as a great way to unwind… without going crazy and drinking the whole bottle (as I write this I am still sipping on the glass I poured myself– I might just want a little bit more).

My sister has a big party to celebrate her wedding with the whole family (they had a small wedding and are having a larger picnic to celebrate with everyone).  It is going to be hard to stay on track… but I am really going to try not to go nuts.  I know the key is starting with a sensible breakfast, which I am going to do.  Until tomorrow…

Today was another solid day which feels good.  I went out for lunch at a burger place and although I really wanted a burger, I got a chopped chicken salad and stayed within my calories.  Right now as I write this I could really go for some ice cream or just something more to eat, but I won’t.  It feels too good to be eating right to blow it for no reason.

What a great day again… within my allotted calories and even though it has only been 3 days, I am already feeling better and I noticed my clothes weren’t quite as snug.  I know the 211+ I weighed in at on Monday morning was a lot of bloating and I am sure next week will be really good because I haven’t had a solid week in over a month.  I just can’t express how happy I am that I am doing this again and that I won’t be right back where I was when I started when the holidays come.  Having yogurt in the morning is key I have realized.  Greek yogurt helps tide me over and it helps me set the day right.

Today was another great day.  Within my allotted calories and I even stayed on track despite having to eat out for lunch and dinner for work related functions.  I am SO happy to be back on this.  I can just feel it too… there isn’t something in the back of my head saying “no, you really aren’t going to stick with this.. just be good today so you can go over tomorrow”.  I can’t wait for tomorrow and for the first time in well over a month, I am looking forward to my date with the grey box next week.

I bet you thought I quit…. well I didn’t.  I just took a break from beating myself up until I got myself back on track.  And guess what, I DID.  Today was my first day within my calories in weeks.  I didn’t count exercise calories or anything (not that I really earn any exercise points, I didn’t really do anything today or most days). I truly stayed within calories.   It felt GREAT to feel like I am back in it.  Even mentally I feel better.  Tomorrow night I have a slight hurdle in that I have a dinner meeting I have to go to.  I pre-ordered the chicken last week with the intention that I would get myself on track.  So I know that I don’t have anything awful like pasta for tomorrow.

I went crazy for the last few weeks.  I mean crazy– normal fat person crazy. (eating large quantities of ice cream, crap food and just eating when I wasn’t even hungry because I wanted more to eat)  I got on the grey box this morning (something I have been avoiding like the plague) and I am back up to 211.2.  Amazing that it took 3 months to take off the weight I had taken off and within a month I have put more than half of it back on.  However, the positive is that I didn’t put all of it back on AND I am sure I can get back down to where I was with the hard work I was putting in before.

My kids have gone back to school and it is all of a sudden activity and event galore.  I have been feeling a little stressed with everything and certainly have been turning to food as a comfort.  However, I feel like I am somewhat getting it under control and that makes it easier to get things going again with the grey box and eating right.  Whenever I am stressed, upset, hurt, mad, whatever…. my coping mechanism is to eat.  Although I know I need to change that, it is hard to shut off that switch.  I do feel like I shut it off today.  One day at a time… we will see how tomorrow goes.  I am feeling pretty positive about things.

More of the same.  Still marching on… but on Monday when I get back from our mini vacation (camping), I plan on being ready for Tuesday to be where I was….. I am feeling confident about that.  I will do it.

Blah– blah, blah, blah…. More of the same.  My clothes are getting tighter again, that was a huge wake up call for me this morning.  I have to get back on this and I know I will.  It is hard to do it knowing I am going away this weekend… But I am finally feeling like I am getting back to where I need to be to be in it to win it.