The grey box came through big this morning.  8.8 pounds down for a new weight of 215.8.  I will never have to look at 220+ number ever again in my life!   I felt so amazing that I wanted to celebrate.  Celebration for me includes food and alcohol.  Certainly not something I am going to do at 7:00 a.m. before I go to work on a Monday.  But something I would have done at 7:00 p.m.  But today I did not.  I celebrated by staying outside with my daughter a little longer at my son’s baseball game than I normally do.  As amazing as 8.8 pounds lost feels, it still doesn’t feel as amazing as eating something awesome.  And therein lies the dilemma.  I want so badly to be thinner, but I have been obese for so long I don’t even remember what that feels like.  But I do remember what it feels like to eat a plate of nachos, a cheeseburger or a pint of ice cream.  And to me that feels good.  It feels like comfort.  Finding a “new” comfort is my new lot in life.   I haven’t found it yet.  However, I can say that spending that extra time with my daughter today felt pretty awesome.