I bet you thought I quit…. well I didn’t.  I just took a break from beating myself up until I got myself back on track.  And guess what, I DID.  Today was my first day within my calories in weeks.  I didn’t count exercise calories or anything (not that I really earn any exercise points, I didn’t really do anything today or most days). I truly stayed within calories.   It felt GREAT to feel like I am back in it.  Even mentally I feel better.  Tomorrow night I have a slight hurdle in that I have a dinner meeting I have to go to.  I pre-ordered the chicken last week with the intention that I would get myself on track.  So I know that I don’t have anything awful like pasta for tomorrow.

I went crazy for the last few weeks.  I mean crazy– normal fat person crazy. (eating large quantities of ice cream, crap food and just eating when I wasn’t even hungry because I wanted more to eat)  I got on the grey box this morning (something I have been avoiding like the plague) and I am back up to 211.2.  Amazing that it took 3 months to take off the weight I had taken off and within a month I have put more than half of it back on.  However, the positive is that I didn’t put all of it back on AND I am sure I can get back down to where I was with the hard work I was putting in before.

My kids have gone back to school and it is all of a sudden activity and event galore.  I have been feeling a little stressed with everything and certainly have been turning to food as a comfort.  However, I feel like I am somewhat getting it under control and that makes it easier to get things going again with the grey box and eating right.  Whenever I am stressed, upset, hurt, mad, whatever…. my coping mechanism is to eat.  Although I know I need to change that, it is hard to shut off that switch.  I do feel like I shut it off today.  One day at a time… we will see how tomorrow goes.  I am feeling pretty positive about things.